Black Fog

This mood that I find myself in is one of the few things that I wish that I could change about myself. The violent mood swings, so prevalent in my past, have over the years worked themselves into gradual mood swings. This oscillation has led me down this road before. Though this time, I am trying to work through it on my own. No meds. No alcohol.

Depression is a very bad thing. Especially, in my family.

Right now, it is all that I can do to write this post, without losing it (sanity). During this time, my posts have been...well, not the best. I have refrained from drawing others into this quagmire. Except for the immediate family and Kent, I have literally not talked to anyone, outside of work. Because in the job, talking is part of the requirements, as is putting on the phony smile and pretending to be happy. But here at home, I don't have to put up that facade.

So, for those of you that read this drivel, I beg that you let me work through this. I promise to be better soon. Really, how much further can I...wait, I know how much further and I want to avoid that like the plague.

Your emails and comments are still very much appreciated.

Just don't expect any hasty replies.